We have all been there! There’s a dilemma in our life and we have to make a decision and it is stressing us out! We may have no idea what to do or where to go and our head feels clouded with thoughts. There’s too much to consider and think about that it is easier to just procrastinate or worry about it until last minute.
Decisions can feel too much like a commitment and can feel very finalized. It creates a lot of anxiety at the thought of a possibility of what feels like the wrong choice. Decisions can be scary especially if others are relaying on us or we have made ones that have hurt us in the past.
We forget that in a lot of circumstances we can come back from wrong choices and take it as a learning experience. We think worst case scenario and that there isn’t any coming back or it might lead to suffering. So then we procrastinate until it is too late or we let someone else make the decision.
It all can derive from an insecurity and a lack of trust within yourself. Maybe it started as a child where you were made to feel like you were incompetent. Maybe you have made bad choices in the past, you are scared of letting others down, you fear missing out by picking one or you are afraid of committing. Anxiety can be a major factor. So how do we overcome this? How do we make decisions in an easier quicker fashion?
It is really important to be take some time to think about what you want. Picking a path will make you feel relieved and have a focus/direction. You won’t have those anxieties and what if questions floating in your mind.
First things first take deep breaths! You may feel your mind starts to race as you try to think of a decision. Relax! You got this, just make sure to slow down and breath. Next I want you to ask yourself what do you want? What is your goal? You can even get trusted friends/families input if you’d like. That could help you see things more clearly.
Try to write out pros and cons of each choice. It is really important to have it written in front of you so you can see the difference in the pros and cons. What are some good things? What are some bad? How will it affect you and your life?
For instance lets say you can’t decide whether you want to break up with your significant other or stay with them. What are the benefits of being with them? And the benefits of breaking up? What are the negatives of being together? And the negatives of being alone?
Whichever side is more, is the clear indication of what you want or need. Now let’s say its 50/50. Because that happens sometimes! Prioritize which is more important to you. Like with breaking up, is your freedom more important or is working on your relationship what you feel better about. Trust your gut instinct. You Know you best.
Now lets say you have multiple problems. You are so overwhelmed and you don’t know where to start or how to tackle each problem. Something that can be helpful is by writing each problem down and then writing some solutions next to it. You then pick which solution is most beneficial for you.
For instance, let’s say you have to make a decision for work, You have to plan your significant others birthday and you have to choose between making it to your sisters party or your friends going away party. Write down each problem. Then list the solution like first deciding your decision for work (a pros and cons list helps with that!) Write the solution for your s.o’s birthday like is it a surprise? is it a dinner? Are you going to go away? Pick which most suits that. Then write the solution between the two parties like maybe going to both or deciding one is more important than the other. Writing it out will help you feel like your mind isn’t so clouded and you’re getting it out from your head to right in front of you.
If your head is cluttered and you are so overwhelmed of course you aren’t going to get anywhere! It is easier just sitting there and complaining.
Writing the problems and solutions helps you declutter your mind and figure whats most important. It is all about prioritizing and taking baby steps.
This is the scariest for most people. We have to just pull the trigger! After you have kind of sat with yourself and you see in front of you what is best, it is time to make it an action. Just do it. You will feel so relieved. Yeah maybe it might turn out to not be the best decision but it also very well can be a good decision. There is only one way to find out!
By not making decisions for yourself you are making yourself helpless and giving away your control in your life. You can take back the control by learning to trust yourself and calling these shots. As time goes on and you learn to trust yourself, it will become easier and easier to make decisions!
What do you guys think? Is there certain things you do to help you make decisions? Have something to share? Leave it all in the comments below!
