Do you ever feel like you give so much more than you get? You constantly are doing things for others, and it feels like no one does the same for you. It feels like no one cares about you the way you care for others. You are tired of not being treated the way you treat others. Maybe you have given your time, your money, your support, your love to people and when you need it in return no one is there to help you. You ask yourself, Why am I treated so unfairly?
There’s a simple answer to that. You treat yourself like you aren’t worth those things. You don’t think you are worth things so people treat you like you aren’t worth anything. Putting yourself first isn’t something you do often. Maybe you constantly give. If you are someone who constantly tries to accommodate or consider others but it isn’t returned, it’s probably because you don’t put yourself first enough. People will treat you how you show them you should be treated.
People respect people that are confident in their worth. They show they matter, and their needs matter. It’s healthy to give but it becomes unhealthy when it’s so much that we act like we aren’t deserving of things. How can you change this?
Really think deep, think about all the times you didn’t put yourself first. Is one of the reasons because you don’t think you are worth it? Figure out if something happened to you that made you feel unworthy of things. Work it out with a counselor if you have to. Understand what your worth is and remind yourself every day. You are worth people doing things for you, you are worth love, you are worth helping.
Being selfish has a bad connotation but it’s only bad when it’s too much. The same thing applies when it comes to being too selfless, that also has its problems. One of the reasons you feel like you are treated unfairly is because you don’t take care of yourself and your needs. Learn to say no sometimes, learn to put yourself first. And others will see that you think you matter so they will also think you matter and treat you like you matter.
Don’t just accept when people mistreat you. Let them know you matter. People will try to take advantage of you and it’s your job to let them know that’s not how you work. If you need or want something let it be known. Ask people, tell people, just don’t stay quiet. If you aren’t getting something you need, it is partially your fault because you didn’t let anyone know you need it! Fight for what you want and need in life. Because if you don’t, who will?
Sometimes we do things, thinking that’s what the other person wants us to do. Maybe you go out of our way for them when they didn’t ask you to because you thought that’s what they wanted. In the end, they don’t really appreciate it. We do these things and we don’t get what we had hoped for in return and it just causes feelings of mistreatment. You don’t have to do those things. Especially not for people that don’t really care when you do them.
“Self love, Self respect, self worth: Theres a reason they all start with self. You can’t find them in anyone else.-Unknown”
The most important part is understanding that we set the guidelines for how people should treat us. Of course, there are people that are going to be bad to you just because, but those people don’t count. If you overall feel on a regular basis you give so much and don’t get anything you need in return, it’s time to take care of yourself. You matter too, Your needs too and it is time you let the people around you know.
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There’s never been a time in my life where I’ve gotten what I’ve given. I could never even hear from Aaron Carter, that’s how unlucky I am in this world.